In order to be married at the Vision Baptist Church you will have to participate in 12 counseling sessions. Each session will be approximately one hour long. We pray that they will be of great blessing to you.
Preparations for your Wedding
Experience has taught us that the correct preparation and planning will help you to have a beautiful and successful wedding ceremony. Since it is our greatest desire that your wedding be a great success
1. Requirements to be married in the Vision Baptist Church with the participation of one of our pastors:
a. Both must professed to have accepted
b. Both must be members of the same church
c. We have no desire to participate in the wedding of someone who is not faithful to church
2. You will have to participate in several counseling sessions (approximately 12 sessions) with one of the pastoral staff about Biblical marriage. It is your responsibility to seek out the pastor and make the appointments and without these sessions we will not be able to participate in your wedding.
3. If you wish to use the facilities of the Vision Baptist Church and are a member then you will have to leave a deposit of $150 for the cleanup after the wedding. If you clean up the building yourself then your deposit will be returned to you. If you do not clean the building well then your deposit will be used to pay someone to clean up the building.
4. The pastoral staff of the Vision Baptist Church will not participate in a wedding where alcoholic beverages will be served even if the reception is held in another place.
5. The pastoral staff of the Vision Baptist Church will not participate if there will be dancing in the reception.
6. The following people should be present for the rehearsal: the bride, bridegroom, all the groomsmen, all the bridesmaids, ushers, mothers and grandmothers, those that will be singing, musicians, father of the bride, flower girl, etc. All those that will be participating and could affect the ceremony.
7. Scheduling the pastor, the building, the reception, etc is all your responsibility.
First Session
Questions and Organization
Give me your testimony of salvation.
Are you prepared economically for your wedding?
Do you have the permission and approval of your parents?
Why do you believe that it is God’s will for you to be married?
Where are you going to live?
Have you considered the differences between you and the way you have been raised that could cause problems in your marriage?
Explain how you think that you will be better able to serve God married than if you were single.
Explain exactly what you want me to do in your wedding.
Second Session
What is Love
Song of Solomon 8:7, I Corinthians 13:4-8
1. Suffereth long—or doesn’t lose its patience, doesn’t get angry easily, accept the other as he or she is
2. Kind—or good, recognizes the needs of others, seeks to help and better the other person
3. Envieth not – does not seek to control the other, is not exclusive, for example does not make your wife stay in the house
4. Vaunteth not itself—does not try to impress, does not always talk about his or her self
5. Is not puffed up—not just thinking of oneself, doesn’t think that he or she is so important, doesn’t think that every thing revolves around him or her self
6. Does not behave itself unseemly—doesn’t have bad manners, doesn’t do things that embarrass
7. Seeketh not her own—taking advantage, everything for me, sex, control
8. Not easily provoked—doesn’t take everything personally, doesn’t get upset easily
9. Thinketh no evil—doesn’t hold bitterness in his or her heart, doesn’t keep count of mistakes, doesn’t rehearse mistakes, destroys all evidence against the other
10. Rejoiceth not in iniquity—making comparisons with the sins of another so that you can feel good about yourself, saying things like everybody does it
11. Rejoiceth in the truth—Christian fellowship, content in what is good, concerned about your spiritual life
12. Beareth all things—no limit to your patience, can live with the errors of others, can feel for others
13. Believeth all things—trusts without limit, believes in the person and his or her value without question, never doubts the other’s integrity
14. Hopeth all things—peace and hope in God that He will accomplish the right
15. Endureth all things—will cross whatever obstacle, love even when the other doesn’t
Third Session
How to strengthen your marriage!
Ephesians 5:22-33
I. Responsibility
a. Husband
i. Be a spiritual leader Ephesians 5:23
ii. Teach Deuteronomy 6:7
iii. Pray I Peter 3:7
iv. Devotions Proverbs 8:17
b. Wife
i. Take care of your responsibilities in your home Titus 2:5
II. Gratefulness I Thessalonians 5:18
a. Husband
i. Pay attention to all that she does to please you
ii. Notice the small things
b. Wife
i. Have a spirit of gratefulness
III. First Place
a. Husband
i. Make her understand that she is number one with you, that she holds the first place in your life I Corinthians 7:32-35, Ephesians 5:25
ii. Have dates with her
iii. Help her with her work
iv. Talk to her heart to heart
v. Do not look like at other women
vi. Assure her that you will always be with her
b. Wife
i. Tell him how you admire him and why
IV. Respect
a. Husband
i. Never make comparisons with other women unless it is to tell her how she is better than others II Corinthians 10:12
b. Wife
i. Never speak of your marriage problems to others outside your home Ephesians 5:33
V. Forgiveness
a. Husband
i. Learn to ask forgiveness Colossians 3:13
b. Wife
i. Forget
ii. Do not mentions past failures
VI. Patience
a. Husband
i. Do not make quick changes without helping her to prepare I Peter 3:7
b. Wife
i. Be flexible about your priorities
VII. Decision making
a. Husband
i. Show her that you know how to discipline yourself Galatians 2:20
b. Wife
i. Show him that you trust him and his decisions
VIII. Discipline
a. Husband
i. Be consistent in the discipline of your children Ephesians 6:4
b. Wife
i. Teach your children to be loyal to their father
IX. Communication
a. Husband
i. Listen to your wife’s opinions, remember the story of Pilate
b. Wife
i. Tell him what you want in your marriage instead of complaining that he doesn’t understand
X. Leadership
a. Husband
i. Do not correct your wife public
ii. Do not embarrass her
b. Wife
i. Be submissive to his direction Ephesians 5:22
XI. Understanding
a. Husband
i. Honor her in public
b. Wife
i. Try to understand what he is trying to say to you
Fourth Session
Seven Concepts needed to have a Stable, Safe and Happy Home
Mark 10:6-9
I. The Manual II Timothy 3:15-17, Hebrews 4:12
a. The Bible is the manual, the rule book for marriage
b. Through it you learn to
i. Accept Christ as your personal Savior
ii. Get Baptized
iii. Have personal and family devotions
iv. Be active in your church
v. Seek to serve the Lord together
II. Permanence
a. Marriage is to be permanent, not to be broken Matthew 19:3-10, Luke 16:18, Romans 7:1-3
b. Fix your problems
c. Say no to divorce both literally and emotional, lovers, bitterness, etc.
III. 100%,
a. Marriage is not 50% of him and 50% of her, Ephesians 5:22-25, I Peter 3:1, I Corinthians 11:3
b. The only way to live this way is to be filled with the Holy Spirit Ephesians 5:18
c. And die to yourself Galatians 2:20
IV. Needs
a. Both have to recognize that there are needs that can only be satisfied “without guilt” in the marriage relationship
b. Ephesians 5:33, I Corinthians 7:1-5
V. Think about your partner
a. Make a commitment to meet the needs of your partner
b. Luke 6:38
c. Galatians 6:7-8
VI. Solution
a. You must fix your differences in the way that God wants you to do so
b. Matthew 5:31-32, 18:15
c. Ephesians 4:26, 32
d. I Peter 3:9
VII. Confidence
a. Marriage is built on confidence, faith and trust and nothing else
b. For your partner to trust you, you will have to trust him or her Ephesians 5:22, Proverbs 31:10-11
Fifth Session
The Family’s Finances
- Have only one purse or account for the family
- Share everything
- The Husband is responsible for the family’s finances
- Decide to serve God instead of money
- Begin tithing, giving and honoring God with all that you have
- Learn to live with what you have
- Choose to have a good name
- Learn to listen to the advice of your wife
The Purposes of God for Money
I. Provision
a. What is necessary Matthew 6:26-30, I Timothy 6:8
b. To depend on Him everyday Matthew 6:11
c. To make us love God more –like the Israelites in the wilderness
d. Develop a spirit of gratitude
e. To teach us to live with what we receive I Timothy 6:6
f. To enjoy what God gives us Hebrews 13:5
II. To confirm God’s direction for our lives Psalm 37:7
a. To give us faith and vision Hebrews 11:7
b. To see who is the Lord of our lives I Timothy 6:17
c. To protect us from bad or wrong things I Timothy 6:9
d. To te
